Bullying
I found this article on "The Sun"'s Website:
Driven to death - by bullies
By DAVID LOWE
May 25, 2007
COMMENT ON THIS STORY
TODAY is The Big Stand – a national event against bullying.
Celebrities including Chantelle, Beth Ditto and Jo Whiley will join thousands around the country in a bid to give bullying the boot.
One man determined to show his support is Paul Vodden.
Tragically Paul knows the devastating consequences of bullying firsthand.
His beloved 11-year-old son Ben killed himself after being tormented at school by fellow pupils - and an irresponsible bus driver.
The last time Paul Vodden heard from Ben was a text saying ‘They’re doing it again.’
Since his first week at secondary school 11-year-old Ben had suffered bullying – and to Paul’s disappointment it showed no sign of stopping.
When Paul, 57, returned home to Southwater, West Sussex, that night last December his wife Caroline, 47, explained Ben was shut in his room.
The concerned dad went in for a chat – but was horrified to discover Ben hanging from his bunk-bed by his shoelaces.
Paul says: “Unless you’ve ever found your child dead there’s no way you’d understand what it’s like.
“I was deeply shocked but started doing CPR and held him in my arms.
"Something just takes over and you go through the motions of getting an ambulance and so on.
The perfect son ... Ben relaxing
“He was pronounced dead at Worthing Hospital.
“That’s when the floodgates opened and all the emotion came pouring out.”
Paul, a forestry worker, has no doubt Ben would be alive if he hadn’t been bullied.
He says: “Ben was an intelligent, loving, sensitive and fun-loving young chap. He was everything you would want in a son, and now he’s gone.
“He’d be alive if the bullying hadn’t happened.
“That was clear from the outset.”
Ben’s torment began when a gang of boys nicked his tie just a day after he started Tanbridge House School, Horsham.
In the months that followed Ben endured taunts like w***er, dickhead and Billy No Mates from fellow pupils - and even the bus driver Brian McCullogh.
Although Paul complained to the school, C and L Coaches in Lancing and West Sussex County Council, no action appeared to be taken.
Paul says: “What happened was a complete systematic failure.
“I complained about the tie incident in September.
“When Ben admitted the bus driver was teasing him I kicked up about that too.
“A few times I offered to drive Ben to school myself. He accepted on a couple of occasions.
“But he was always keen to try and sort out the problem himself.
“I discovered a week before Ben died on 12 December that he was still on the same bus and facing the same driver months later.
“If anything was done to stop the bullying it wasn’t enough and it was too late to save Ben.”
I see hundreds and hundreds of children being bullied every day and frequently have no idea how to stop it or even to intervene. I talk to the students, recemmond them for mediation, call parents, but it all seems to be a hopeless cause. Frequently the students are bullies because that's what their parents have taught them. So how to we get the bullying to stop?
the end of another year
It's over. As of today the 2006-2007 school year is officially over. I still have some of my journal entries to share, but I am done with school until August.
It's been a rough year and I can honestly say I'm ok with the end of this school year.
May 7, 2007
When I walked into my classroom this morning, my thermostat read below 50 degrees. An hor later it was still below 50 and the air conditioner came on full blast. I don't understand how the schools can justify such poor temperature control. We go on and on about how the teachers and students need to put more and more effort into our work to improve test scores, but it's hard to do when the schools can be such a miserable places to be.
At 11am my classroom finally hit 60 degrees and by 12:30pm it was warm enough to take my jacket off. Mind you I still had a sweatshirt and a t-shirt on.
April 11, 2007
If I make it through the rest of this school with my sanity intact, I'll be surprised. My 7th period class this is the worst I have ever had. the behavior that I deal with in there is absolutely horrific. On Monday I was standing next to Andrew when all of a sudden Lenny jumped out of his chair and punched Andrew on the back of his head. There was nothing I could have done to prevent the attack, yet the parents of both boys seem to think I was being negligent. Andrew didn't it Lenny back, however, a very long string of disgusting words was said. So I had to write them both up. I was disappointed that I had to write Andrew up; he's been making a big improvement on his behavior.
After I got finished dealing with that situation, I had to try to restore order to my 7th period. I had two students who asked if they could get water over and over. Of course I said no, but one of the boys got up and left. The other student got up, walked to my desk, and spit in my cup. I had to leave the room I was so mad. I have been agered to tears very few times. I did manage to calm down after the end of the day, but the icky feeling stucke with me.
Unfortunately every B-day is turning into a nightmare for me. When it comes to 7th period it's like I"m not even there. Erik will go on and on no matter what action I take. Kayleen talks endlessly then gets mad at me when she has to face condequences for her behavior. I am so tired of having that class.
Sadly my 8th period class is getting to be pretty bad as well. I have three boys in there with terrible behavior. Antonio used to be a great student, but his behavior has been horrible. Then they added Jonathan. Jonathan started out extremely quiet. He rarely completed any of his assignments, but was quiet. Lately, however, he has been very rude, disrespectful, and disruptive. He doesn't seem to care about getting into trouble which is pretty bothersome.
April 3, 2007
The parent conference we had yesterday lasted forever. We get out of school at 3pm and I didn't leave the conference until 5:30. There were quite a few people there at the conference too. This particular student was institutionalized for a period of time, and upoon his release he was given a wide variety of services. He has a case manager from Desert Hills (the local child psychiatric center), who was present at the meeting. He also has a behavior management specialist, a BMS manager, a family reconstructive specialist, and a Youth Development Inc. case manager. Four of of his teachers were there, along with the Student Action Team manager. The principal was there, and the student's mother. This mother seems to believe her son walks on water. He is a huge behavior problem for us, be she always manages to blame us for all of his problems. It is parents like this that make me hate my job a little bit.
I totally overestimated the amount of time it would take my students to complete today's assignment. My first two classes had 30-45 minutes of free time because they all got done so quickly. I didn't have anything else for them because I'm starting a new unit next week and I want all of the classes to start at the same time.
As of today there are 36 days of school left, which means I will see each of my classes at the most 18 times.
April 2, 2007
Today is the first day back after spring break and my brain did not want to go back to work. I hate going back after break. We started the week with a B-day so I had a meeting right off the bat, it was lame and unorganized. I also found out that I have to stay for a parent conference AFTER school. It makes no sense why we have to schedule time AFTER school when we have conferencing time built into the school day. This particular child is a pain in the butt. He has a behavior management specialist that follows him around all day and essentially does nothing.
My 7th period class was pretty horrible. I can honestly say I hate that class.
I'm on the hunt
I've been at my school for five years now. Some of you have been listening to be complain about this school for about three years, and few of you know the entire story.
I got hired at this school about six years ago as a 6th grade language arts teacher. I did that for two years at this school, and we had a HUGE drop in enrollment, so we had to cut six teachers. I had the choice of taking a short term assignment somewhere else (and lose my retirement, insurance, etc) or taking the science position where I'm at now. I had become pretty comfortable at my school so I made the decision to stay. My principal swore up and down she would do everything in her power to get me my job back as soon as possible.
Well that was three years ago. I hate teaching science, but I have stuck with it because I have made a committment to my school. And I feel like it is MY school. I have had three to four siblings from the same families. I've had cousins, uncles, aunts. I love knowing that 25% of my students are relatives of kids I have had before. I know the community, they know me, and I'm comfortable. PLUS we bought our house on this side of town because it's close to where we both work. But I've been waiting patiently for the past three years for my Language Arts position to come back to me.
So this year there are two language arts openings for the upcoming school year. One of them is a "short term" position because the woman is taking a year of maternity leave. She's a 7th grade language arts teacher. The second is a 6th grade Language Arts teacher who is retiring (so it's a long term position.)
I got my official "change of position" paperwork about two weeks ago, and my principal is offering me the short term position. I'm pretty fucking pissed. I have refused, which means she has to find me a long term position within the school, but she said flat out she isn't going to offer me the sixth grade position. I've then got the option to find a new school or take a science position in my school.
Now I feel like I have given everything BUT my firstborn to this school and this is what I'm getting in return. Many of you have been listening to the stories I have told, and you know the hell in which I teach. My principal is currently going through a paternity lawsuit because her husband believes her son is the product of an affair between her and the husband of one of the teachers. It is a well known fact that my principal has been having a lesbian "affair" of sorts with two of the other teachers at my school. This is probably the most unprofessional situation I have ever worked in, and this includes Chuck E. Cheese's where the managers were all 17 years old.
So I'm looking for a new school and it's breaking my heart. I've had so many kids that have asked me if they can be my student aides next year. I have so many kids from my very first group at this school that are graduating from high school next year and were planning on sending me announcements. That can only happen if I stay at the same school. I'm so devastated. I cried all day today knowing that was the decision that I had to make.
March 22, 2007
Team this morning cncluded a parent conference for a student we've had conferences four times already. He has some major impulse control problems and has not yet been able to control himself. He did, however, manage a HUGE academic improvement during the last quarter.
The rest of the team meeting included a lenthy discussion on why our jubs sucks right now. Being a teach right now feels frequently not worth it. Especially when nyou work at a school like mine. Our students are a different breed and yet they are supposed to meet the same measures of students who are essentially from a different world. Many of them even speak a different language!
My 7th period class is so completely out of control. It took them 20 minutes to write 3 complete sentesces which is ridiculuous. When I tried to get them to grade thier papers, I lost them again. Edwin is probably my biggest talker. He rarely acknowledges that an adult is in the room, nor does he care. He is missing a ton of assignments and is currently failing my class too. I had five students all trying to arm wrestle while I was trying to get a lecture started. I want to pull my hair out! I had two students who worked very hard the entire class period (yay!), and two other students who got their work done but talked the entire time. I feel like giving up with this class, even though I know I shouldn't. I'll try to focus on the students who wish to learn at this point.
March 21, 2007
Of course I can't walk from my classroom to the lunge and back without managing to get myself into at least one conversation. Today I ended up in three. First was the 8th grade academy leader. She asked me to speak to one of the teachers about the referrals she submits to us. I don't like to talk to that woman any more than anybody else does, so I'm not thrilled about that request.
My second conversation was with my mom, so that was ok. But then I got locked into conversation with Ophelia. Ophelia is another 6th grade teacher at my school. Talked to her has the potential to be relativelly unpleasant. She has this belief she knows more than anybody alive. The topic this morning happened to be one of our students. None of us enjoy this child much. However, Ophelia was the only teacher at his conference that had good things to say about him. turns out half of what she said was fabricated, but she's never going to openly admit to that. She also claims she never has any behavior problems with him. The rest of us want to throttle him. Needless to say, it is not the best way to start a work day.
My first period class is so far ahead of the rest of my classes. I had to be really creative with them today. I'm so sick of all the interruptions to my schedule that is causing my classes be all over the place. So I"m having them teach sections from the book to each other. Hopefullly that works.
March 20, 2007
This morning I had barely walked in the door of the school when my team got called because a parent was waiting for us. Nobody said anything to us about a parent conference today so that was pretty frustrating. It was for a kid that I don't know very well, so I couldn't even come up with a good reason for us to be having a conference!
THEN! Despite my having tons of crap to get done with my team, the principal informed us of a continuous improvement training we were supposed to be in during our team prep. We had no prior knowledge of this so we were all a bit frazzled. What bothered me even more is that we continue to go over the same stuff in all of theose trainings. It's like kill-and-drill for the teachers. I'm pretty sick of it. I'm also sick of the district mandating more and more shit that takes time away from my instruction time. And for some reason the district higher ups feel like this extra stuff is more important than content. Unfortunately, nobody ever asks a teacher before they're making decisions about education.
I have not been motivated to be at work lately (maybe it's because of all this continuous improvement crap that has nothing to do with my teaching or my content). I get here to work and immediately feel tired and lethargic. I don't want to work with the kids at all, nor do I actually want to teach them. Obviously this is not the attitude a teacher should have. Unfortunately I can't seem to pull myself out of this job funk that I'm in. I love teaching, but I am sick of the rest of the crap that I'm forced to be responsible for.
March 16, 2007
7th Period
I was running late to this class, so when we came in I asked the students to get started quickly. I asked them to stop talking quite a few times, then I tried to circulate the room a bit. That didn't help to quiet them down. I finally asked three of the students who were being quiet and paying attention to join me in the back of the classroom and I worked with them only. The remainder of the class, save for four students, all trickled back to join me. I guess that tactic worked this time.
Just a little note
I keep a journal of sorts at school to write down how my day is going...etc. I'm going to go ahead and post them here. They will be slightly out of order so I'll be putting the date in the title. The names of any subjects I mention will be changed in an effort to respect the privacy of my students.
Four years of disappointments
I signed my official notification of "change of position" for next year. I've been at this school for five years and have been waiting to get my original job back for three of those five years. I abhor teaching science and I've been patiently awaiting my 6th grade language arts job to return to me. My change of position paperwork notifies me that I'm going to be put into 7th grade language arts.
This does not make me happy.
I could have taken a 7th grade position last year, and I chose not to so I could stay in 6th grade. I don't like 7th graders. They're horrid.
I'm currently at odds with myself and this decision. I love my school, I love the staff, and I especially love my students. However, I don't want to do 7th grade. So what do I do?
A thought....ok a few thoughts
Right after the Virginia Tech shootings I got on here and typed my little heart out. Sadly I lost my internet connection and my post was gone. It's really too bad because, in my point of view, it was a great post. However, I shall bless and release and move on.
I am quickly coming to the end of yet another school year. As you can see by the number of entries I've had time for this year, it's been a hell of a ride. I work in an inner-city "ghetto" school and my students frequently don't test well. Due to the wonderful "No Child Left Behind Act" my school is required to jump through numerous hoops each year just to prove we are doing our jobs. Most teachers get visits from the principal once a year and get a paper signed at the end of the year that says they are doing their job. That practice does not happen at my school. We get four principal visits per year, followed by a lengthy "post observation" meeting where we get to hear all about our shortcomings. I fully admit that I'm not the greatest teacher alive, but I do what I can. I'm good at my job, and I'm confident of that fact. It is still daunting to walk into the principal's office to hear what I lack.
At the end of each year we go through what we lovingly refer to as a "debriefing." We get an overview of what we did that was good, what we did that needs improvement, and what next year is going to look like. My debriefing is tomorrow. I'm required to show that I followed my professional development plan, which included a wide vareity of professional readings and how I can incorporate them into my lesson plans. I need to show the lesson plans, and student work that documents I did what I said I was going to do. I also have to provide the administrators with data that shows my students have made improvements this school year. Each major subject area has a quartely exam we devised that should tell us whether or not the students are on the right track. My data is beautiful. Unfortunately, my data is supposed to show I teach my subject well, and I don't want to teach science. So I kinda wish my data were less impressive.
Next year we are looking at a state take over of our school. My students have failed to make what we call "adequate yearly progress" based on the state's standardized test. I watch these kids every day and am amazed that some of them even make it to school, much less manage to bring a pencil and a piece of paper. I have students of hard core gang members. Last year one of my students shot and killed his older brother in a gang fight. Many of my students have one or both parents in prison for various felonies. Many students live with grandparetns because one or both parents is dead or unwilling to care for them. I have a student who has three brothers and sisters, and her mom took in her sister's kids and now has a total of 12 children to care for. This student has straight A's and volunteers at a battered woman's shelter. It's amazing what these kids can do. Last year I had a student whose mother beat him with a skateboard so badly he had to have reconstructive surgery on his face. He dropped out of school and got his GED. Now he's the managed of a local McDonald's. Yes, I did have a 16 year old 7th grader. Now he's far better off than he ever was beforehand. Did he make his AYP? Not in the eyes of the government, but in the eyes of those who have watched his struggles for the past three years, he's far surpassed anything we could have hoped for.
